Thursday, April 17, 2014

An Interview With A Vampire ~ Repost

Tara: “Hi, everyone! I’m Tara Torolf. I’m a vampire slayer. Tianna had a vampire contact her and asked for an interview to prove they aren’t what everyone thinks. Can you imagine me rolling my eyes? Of course they’re everything they seem. I should know. Though… to be honest, most of them don’t kill their vict—er…donors. 

“Since Tianna couldn’t do this interview due to her deadlines fast approaching—one of them being my book she hasn’t even started yet, she asked me to interview this…this vampire. I know the answers to most of these questions already, but I’ll ask them since it’s what she wants. 

“Here with me today, is Gideon Molfetta. He is a Cartuotey here with me to set the record straight before he decides to end his existence. It’s a shame really, considering he is a very good looking man—vampire—whatever. 

 “Hello, Gideon. Tianna sends her regards and says thank you for joining me here today.” 

 Gideon: “Hello, Tara. It is a pleasure as always.” *winks and tries for a sexy grin.* 

Tara: “Don’t start that with me, Gideon. You know I’m a vampire slayer and Tianna’s transparent attempt at matchmaking is not going to work. Now for the questions. “Do you actually drink blood, or do you suck it up through your teeth like some sort of weird straw?” 

Gideon: “We drink it, actually, though if we’re in dire need it goes up through our teeth and immediately into our bloodstream. *waggles his brows* “It’s a little anti climactic if you know what I mean.” 

Tara :“Um… I imagine it is. Is it getting hot in here? .“I know garlic keeps everyone away, but what about silver, crosses and holy water?” 

Gideon: “Um… Silver is for werewolves. That whole thing about it hurting vampires is a myth. It does looks good on us though. As far as crosses and holy water, we are not the spawn of Satan. These things do nothing to us.” 

Tara: “What about wooden stakes?” 

Gideon: “I don’t think a wooden steak would taste delicious at all.” *laughs* 

Tara: “Do you guys sparkle in the sunlight like the vampires in those movies and novels everyone loves so much or do you actually turn to ash in the sunlight?” 

Gideon: *Laughs* “The only thing sunlight does to us is make us tan.” 

Tara: “I thought that nice tan of yours was from a jar.” 

Gideon: *sits back and rests his arms over the back of the chair. 

It really shows off the bulge in his pants that puts another question to mind* 

Gideon: “Not on your life. It’s all me, sweetheart. 

Tara: “Is what they say about the vampire libido true?” 

Gideon: *wink* “Where do you think all of the legends come from?” 

Tara: “That’s not an answer, Gideon. Come on, spill. True or not?” 

Gideon: “Oh, it’s true, sweetling.” 

Tara: “Prove it!” Gideon: “Is tonight good?” 

Tara:  “I didn’t mean with me! Why are you undressing here? Oh, my goodness! Are all Cartuotey built like that? Hoo! Is it getting hot in here or is it just me? Okay, everyone. That’s it for today’s questions. I have a few more interviews to do so make sure you check back often to see who’s in the hot seat next! I have to run now. I have this huge thing on my to do list. See you next time.”